My Penance is What?

If you read my quick takes from Friday, you would know that I was struggling with getting to confession!

I went to a different Church this Sunday for Mass since I was near my parents house. I am so glad I did. They made an announcement that there would be two chances for confession this week. Last night at 7:15 or 8:15 and Thursday at 7pm

Wow. What a parish to have Confession 3 times the week before Christmas! Beautiful!

I was praying a lot before that it would be a good confession. I went in and knelt down and like a wind out of nowhere, the Spirit forced the words out of me that I so badly needed to come out!

Then came the funny part. Well not totally funny, but strange I guess. Usually, at the very least, for penance, it is either a formal prayer (1 Our Father or 1 Decade of the Rosary, or a couple Decades) or a general prayer (pray for priests this week or something)...

..."Praise the name of Jesus...ya know, sometimes we call it a Mantra...but just repeat over and over 'I praise your Holy Name, Jesus...things like that...for about a minute or two, here or in the car or wherever"

You can imagine my thought process here, "Did this priest just tell me to be charismatic for my penance? And only a minute?"

Well, I was so grateful for a good confession that I almost couldn't stop praising in this "mantra" way, the entire hour car ride home. That was the easiest "penance" but the most amazing because the turmoil I was feeling for my actions before was pretty strong and very penance like, and after, I found all I wanted to do was worship/praise!

Dear Jesus, thank you for your inexhaustable mercies and unconditional love! Amen!

"No Duh!"

Did anyone ever say that to you when you were a kid? I'm not sure what it even means. It insinuates that you didn't know something relatively obvious...but why no duh? I don't get that...but I just had that type of moment just now.

"No Duh Kristina"

I had gotten a scare this week: my account with school said my balance was, get ready....$2,390 or something in that general ballpark. If you didn't know, I spent my emergency fund to replace my tires and pay for an extra class I took in the first 8 weeks of school. Not okay!

I also have been trying to understand the reason for the lost cell phone. (that story here)

"No Duh Kristina"

This morning I got an email back from the Accounting office at Albertus after I asked for options to pay them..."Kristina, this is your balance because your Financial Aid hasn't been dispersed yet, it takes a few weeks for that to come in, but you have plenty coming to cover it all..."

I can now see the "No Duh" turning into God saying pretty clearly "Trust me, I've got you in the palm of my  hand"

I am so amazed that, although I'm such a sinner, and although I don't always trust Him, He still has me in His hands. He still offers opportunity for grace, mercy, and He still guides me.

Dear God, you amaze me daily. Thank you so much for the endless love, mercy and guidance you give me. Bless all of those around me with this realization so we can all bask in your Glory forever! Amen!

edit: moments after posting this, I went to facebook...a new message in my inbox? Hmm...it's a message from my co-worker's son Greg..."my  mom thinks she found a phone for you..." Gras a Dye! No Duh! Of course He's got it covered!